Hetalia Hogwarts, A History
by LightningZebracorn
Summary: Total Hetalia fic. Human names. Only the HPverse setting is being used. Genres to be slowly incorporated. Eventual BL.Not severe. Rated T for later on. Come join the Hetalia cast at Hogwarts as they go about their day to day life, but NOT as students. ;
1. A Letter From Hogwarts

He had been traveling the world seeking out fantastic beasts, trying to figure out where to find them. It certainly would have been nice to have had a book of some sort to help him. Now, however, he was back home in Britain and ready for a nice relaxing—.tap. Damn.

...

Arthur Kirkland was a wizard, he had attended Hogwarts school of Witchcraft and Wizardry and after graduating had proceeded to travel extensively researching various magical creatures. In his seventh year he had written several studies on some of the more intelligent of magical creatures available for him to observe and research. The publishing of the studies had led, to his personal displeasure, innumerable people to pester him with owls, the constant barrage of which he had only escaped after the start of his travels. It had been somewhere in the Southern Continent if he remembered correctly.

Now, not even twenty minutes after having arrived home to his flat, another owl had found him. No doubt some silly, overly persistent witch sending fan mail. Honestly, why the paper had felt it necessary to publish his picture along with the article was beyond him.

Opening the window a tawny owl hopped inside and held out a leg for him rather imperiously. Untying the letter Arthur scanned it, the address was quite eerily specific and, flipping the envelope over in his hand, the Hogwarts crest was instantly recognizable on the seal. Pushing down his curiosity Arthur glanced at the owl, clearly whoever had sent the creature knew that he did not own an owl and desired a reply. Gesturing to the wide perch against one of the walls Arthur left the owl to reposition itself while he fetched it some water and a small bit of meat from his recently bought groceries.

"There you are" He smiled as the owl quickly polished off the meat and gratefully drank the proffered water. Turning his attention back to the letter he sank down into the chair at his small kitchen table and, breaking the seal deftly, began to read.

"_Dear Sir Arthur Kirkland,_

_It has come to my attention that you have returned from your travels and are once more in Britain. I hope that your journey was fruitful, that you acquired a great deal of the knowledge that you sought, and perhaps some that you were not seeking. I will come to the heart of the matter quickly though._

_I recall as a student you were quite enthralled with magical creatures, indeed I believe that was the purpose behind the trip you were, until so recently, on. As a student you also naturally exemplified the traits of your house without effort. I could expound upon your personal successes for quite some time but I feel I am losing track of what this missive is meant to convey._

_There has been a recent opening of which I would greatly like to confer with you about in person. Please send the owl back with any date this coming week when you would be able to meet and I will clear my schedule for the time and expect you._

_Much has changed at Hogwarts in the years you have been away on your quest for knowledge, but Hogwarts will always welcome back those whom love her._

_I await your owl, Sincerely,_

_Headmaster of Hogwarts_"

A long illegible signature preceded the Title of headmaster in the letter and Arthur forced himself to take a deep breath before looking over the correspondence once more. A meeting with the Headmaster, undue praise, a mysterious "opening", and repeated references to the "quest for knowledge". He didn't have to be a Ravenclaw to figure out he was being offered a professorship… although it probably didn't hurt.

Writing a small note he jotted down a time and date, his thanks for the letter, and polite but brief response to a few select things Arthur folded the parchment and sealed it. Standing up to continue settling his flat back to order Arthur looked over at the owl.

"I'll give you the reply to take this evening, you can rest for now." Turning away he walked out of the kitchen after receiving a thankful hoot and set back to work. A Hogwarts Professorship… it was highly tempting and there might be more in it depending on what one inferred from the headmaster's letter. Arthur liked the idea; it wouldn't be overly taxing to his personal studies either and… it would be nice to return to Hogwarts once more.

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><p>AN: Hi there! This is my second fic and it's my first time doing a chapter fic. I'm writing it for a friend but I hope you enjoy it as well! Constructive criticism is appreciated, all feedback is loved. 3 Seriously, I'm going to need feedback with this one, I've never done a chapter fic before so if you like this please let me know that you want it to continue or else it might get trapped in the rat cupboard where all the naughty fics are sent when they are abandoned.<p>

Let's hope that doesn't happen! Please, if you can, take the time to review. Feedback let's me know if I'm doing this right. ;) Thanks for reading and I hope you'll stay tuned for more! 3


	2. A Visit to the Headmaster's Office

AN: I am so so so sorry. I was going to try to get this done before Otakon and then last minute cosplay things got in the way. Ugh, this is such a bad chapter to beg for forgiveness with. This one's a bit dry, things should start to get interesting towards the end of next chapter and from then on hopefully it'll be slice of life awesome hijinks all the way. Thank you to everyone who reviewed and to everyone who added this story to your alerts! I hope to have Chapter three up within the next seven days. Please enjoy!

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><p>When Arthur arrived outside the gates of Hogwarts he couldn't quite keep the grin off his face as he gazed up at the castle. It seemed to be the same as always and, forcing his attention back to the present, he walked through the gateway and started on the trek up to the castle.<p>

The door to the headmaster's office opened to him immediately and, stepping inside, Arthur took in the changes present. The room was more sparsely decorated than it had been on his last visit to the office; but then again, the headmaster was quite different from his predecessor.

"Sir Kirkland, please, come in." As a professor the headmaster had taught transfiguration, and that had been the man's position the last time Arthur had seen him. Gesturing to a chair the man sat at his desk smiling slightly, although the expression didn't seem to reach his eyes. "Would you care for a drink? Water? Tea? Perhaps some pumpkin juice? No? Very well then." The two sat, studying each other, until the headmaster once more spoke. "I suppose you know what I called you here for, but allow me to make the offer official. There has been an opening in the staff. The previous Care of Magical Creatures professor has decided to go on an expedition in search of yeti." He paused here and Arthur vaguely wondered if the headmaster was sharing his thoughts on just how ill thought out such an expedition was. "I would like to extend the offer of the post to you. You would be an excellent addition to the staff, as I mentioned in the letter I sent you." Again the headmaster paused, this time studying Arthur intently with his dark eyes, clearly trying to gauge his reaction.

"I see… well headmaster, you flatter me. I would not have thought my experience has leant me any suitable disposition for teaching. I have been relatively alone for the past several years." Arthur was studying the headmaster as closely as the man had been observing him not a moment before; now, however, the man's attention seemed to have wandered.

Raising his head the man popped an odd candy into his mouth before speaking around the sweet obstruction.

"Nonsense, even as a student you showed great aptitude and willingness to help your fellow classmates. Even if you do not come to be known as an overly friendly or open teacher, I have no doubt you will do an admirable job. Unless, of course, I have misjudged and you have no interest in the position?" At the headmaster's questioning tone Arthur shook his head. He had thought there was something less pleasant attached to the offer. There had been no hint of anything of the sort throughout their conversation though. Perhaps he was being overly cautious, it was a trait he had always seemed to have possessed and his travels had only served to intensify the characteristic.

"No, you did not misjudge. It is… an appealing offer." Again, the two men sat in silence for a moment, studying each other, trying to work out what the next move would be. The man had always been hard, no, impossible to read. Even now, Arthur wasn't sure if the headmaster was bored or amused with the proceedings.

"Appealing enough to accept?" The headmaster turned his gaze from Arthur and once more popped one of the odd candies into his mouth. It was pale brown, but it didn't look like any sort of toffee Arthur had seen before, and the shape was irregular as well. Odd angles and, Arthur shook himself mentally; what should it matter was type of candy the headmaster chose to eat.

"Yes, I believe it just may be. There are of course a few details I would like to go over before I officially accept though, you understand." It was not a question and with a soft crumbling, crunching noise the headmaster destroyed what was left of the candy in his mouth and nodded.

"Of course."

Negotiations for the terms of employment went rather smoothly until the end when Arthur remembered what had been bothering him.

"There have been several changes in staff you mentioned, you yourself could even be considered part of that." A bow of the head was all the response he received. "Who is head of Ravenclaw house?" A pause, 'Ah' Arthur thought, 'there it is.'

The headmaster eyed him silently before answering.

"Yes… Bruce was the head of Ravenclaw house. If you accept the position as professor here, you will be taken into consideration for the position as well."

Head of Ravenclaw house as well? Arthur weighed the pros and cons quickly in his head. It wouldn't be that bad really, if he was elected to the position, and there was always the chance he wouldn't be chosen. After several long moments of deliberating silence Arthur nodded once.

"That isn't a completely negative outcome; I suppose I was expecting something much worse. I will accept the position as professor of Care of Magical Creatures, and I'd like to thank you for this opportunity."

The headmaster smiled then, slightly, as if more pleased with himself than happy of Arthur's statement.

"Wonderful, would you mind returning next week? We can sort out this head of house business then, and you can begin to move your belongings into your quarters."

"Yes, that sounds like a solid plan." A week, he had a week to figure out what to do about his 'Souvenirs', plenty of time. Standing from his chair Arthur nodded and received a hand held up in farewell, which he returned before walking to the door and leaving, he had a lot to do in the next week.

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><p>Hope you enjoyed, reviews make my day and keep me writing! No matter how small or Anonymous they may be!<p>

(PS. chapters should slowly be getting longer as I get used to posting a chapter fic and as we get further along in things.)


	3. A Second Sorting and the Heads of Houses

AN: ; A; I am so sorry. I should have had this up a week ago but real life decided that it was time I started actually acting like a responsible adult, I got my license and a job all in the last two weeks, and my babcia who I almost never see came for a visit and I didn't sleep in my own bed for half a week in that span, painful, but worth it. I'm really sorry for the tardiness of this post, I hope to stay at a steady chapter a week pace once I get back to campus and classes start back up. Here's hoping!

So now that my excuses have been made down to business, I thought this would be longer but I guess it isn't? Which sucks, probably like it does since I barely managed to edit it at all this time around. ANYWAYS. I've recieved quite a few questions in confusion about country/name-ness so let me try to clear it up here:

Arthur Kirkland is equatable to England but as this is an AU fic he is not actually a nation, it's the character that I'm trying to make the same, not the position of said character.

If anybody ever has any questions feel free to drop me a line and ask away! :) I'll do my best to try to explain as long as it doesn't ruin any of the surprises! ;)

And I think I mentioned doing this before so for those of you unfamiliar with the nations' human names official and popular fanon I'll put a key at the beginning listing characters for the first time they're mentioned.

Arthur Kirkland: England

Bruce: (was mentioned last chapter but I totally forgot to do this) Australia (Fanon/What I chose of the ones told to me)

Kiku Honda: Japan

Ivan Braginski: Russia

Antonio Fernendez Carriedo: Spain

Alfred F. Jones: America

I think those are the only ones that have been mentioned so far. Once more, those are just the characters the names correspond to, the characters in this are NOT Nations themselves, it's an AU. Sorry for any confusion I may have caused any of you! Please enjoy Chapter three!

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><p>By the end of the week Arthur had easily packed away most of his belongings. Having traveled extensively, he hadn't really been able to take very many things with him along the way. Certain things he had been able to ship or mail home, but over all he had had very few belongings. First restricted to what he could fit in his Hogwarts trunk and, once graduated and out in the world, stuck to what he could squeeze into his expansion charmed luggage case.<p>

It hadn't really taken him the full week to pack. He had, after all, been home barely long enough to unpack anything. No, packing hadn't taken long at all… until he realized that he had barely any wizards robes to wear.

Traveling the world generally meant trekking through quite a number of muggle inhabited areas. His clothes had been chosen to suit those conditions; although admittedly with a number of subtler magical precautions included. No muggle would be able to recognize dragon hide for what it really was and the material had proved useful for protection under a number of different circumstances. For Hogwarts he would need to buy some robes though, which meant he would have to visit Diagon Alley.

All in all the entire trip had been uneventful, distasteful, but uneventful nonetheless. Arthur didn't particularly enjoy robe fittings really. They were, after all was said and done, little more than glorified night gowns. They were also a natural magnet for all sorts of accidents. Arthur much preferred the more muggle styled clothing, easier to move around in, didn't get caught on anything, and they were so much less prone to catching fire. Still, work attire was work attire, and so he had grudgingly purchased a modest number of simple robes.

It was his 'souvenirs' that were causing him the most distress and, by the end of the week, Arthur had been forced to acknowledge that he really had little option other than to actually take the items with him and hope that things wouldn't end in disaster.

… … …

He arrived at Hogwarts perfectly fine and once more set off towards the castle, this time with luggage in tow. The meeting with the headmaster would come first, before he got to put his things away, so it was the headmaster's office to which he made his way.

"Sir Kirkland, welcome back. Please, come in." The headmaster was standing in front of his desk and Arthur shifted his attention back to the matters at hand.

"Headmaster," Arthur nodded to the man and let his gaze slide over onto the room's only other inhabitant. "Kiku, it's been awhile." Arthur hadn't known that Honda had gotten a job at Hogwarts but it really wasn't that much of a surprise.

Kiku Honda had been a year younger than Arthur when they had attended Hogwarts as students. As such they had known each other but had had their own circles in which they socialized. Rumors of the boy having strange hobbies that Arthur had heard in his time as prefect were generally ignored. Kiku had still been an exemplary Ravenclaw, regardless of silly rumors.

"It has indeed Arthur, how were your travels? Fruitful I trust." Kiku gave him a small half smile from where he sat.

"Very, but if you'd like to hear more about them perhaps we could talk later? I'd like to get this over with so I can finally unpack." Arthur turned and nodded to the headmaster expectantly.

"Of course," the headmaster moved over to a shelf along the wall and pulled down an object that was familiar to every Hogwarts student, current or former. "I believe you know what to do?" The headmaster set it down on his desk before sitting down, leaving the two men to approach the desk, and the Sorting Hat, on their own.

Kiku, having held his position at the school for longer, even if only for a year, placed the old hat on his head first. Silence fell over the room and its inhabitants for several minutes until Kiku suddenly removed the hat from his head and handed it straight to Arthur who took it and donned it himself.

"Ah, one of the Kirkland's, you've gone and gotten yourself knighted I see. A Sir Kirkland then… I see that thirst for knowledge is still there, my, my did it take you far. You've come back regardless though, and to Hogwarts even. Hmmm… Yes… you ought to be able to get along with the other heads, perhaps grudgingly, but you seem to do so with everyone. Which to pick though, which to pick… alright, take me off then, I'm done with you ." The Sorting Hat fell silent then and Arthur removed it from his head and placed it back on the headmaster's desk. Arthur exchanged a quick glance with Kiku before they both turned again to watch the Sorting Hat.

After several minutes Kiku and Arthur had both taken a seat to wait. How odd, the hat didn't seem to take nearly as long when sorting students into houses. He thought about all of the sorting he had sat through… His own sorting, all those years ago, when he'd first come to Hogwarts. A cough broke through his thoughts and Arthur looked up at the headmaster who was now covering his too pale hair with the hat. After a few moments the headmaster nodded and the mouth-like rip near the brim of the hat opened.

"Sir Arthur Kirkland, new head of Ravenclaw House." The house stated this all rather sedately compared to its normal excited yell during normal sorting. The hat once more seemed to become lifeless and the headmaster removed it from his head as he stood and crossed his office to set it once more on its shelf until it would be needed once more.

"Well then, there you have it. Congratulations Sir Kirkland." The headmaster seemed to be looking at something behind Arthur for a moment before again his eyes seemed to settle on him. "Well you'd best get along and unpack, thank you both for your time. Sir," the headmaster handed Arthur a roll of parchment. "Your room and some information you might find useful. Feel free to contact me if you find yourself in need. Professors," and that was their dismissal from the office.

Outside in the corridor the two men stopped and stood slightly awkwardly in silence.

"I am glad that it is you who became head of Ravenclaw house." Kiku's sudden words shocked Arthur a bit. It must have shown on his face because Kiku continued speaking. "I think that you will do very well. I am perhaps too… reserved for the position." Another small smile graced the man's face as he held out a hand for Arthur. "Congratulations old friend."

Taking the proffered hand Arthur smiled in return and with a thanks and goodbye the two split ways at the end of the corridor.

Arthur let out a breath he hadn't known he had been holding. At least Kiku had seemed genuine in his congratulations, it was nice to know that he wasn't starting the job with any of the Ravenclaw staff holding a grudge against him.

It did seem a bit odd though that there had only been the two of them though… Perhaps the man he'd seen stalking away from the headmaster's office when he's first arrived had withdrawn himself from the selection? The man had seemed familiar, but Arthur hadn't seen his face so there was no chance to be sure.

Once more pushing his thoughts aside for later Arthur unrolled the parchment he'd been given and reading straight away where his rooms were set off to find them, having his luggage follow him with a flick of his wand.

Arthur soon realized he knew exactly where his rooms were and, even after years of absence from the castle, let his feet carry him there automatically as he further perused the information the headmaster had given him.

The first section was a rather helpful list of duties expected of him as a head of house.

That information was followed by a list of the other heads of houses. Ivan Braginski as head of Hufflepuff… well that was… unexpected, of course many people had not understood why the hat had placed Ivan in Hufflepuff to begin with, clearly it had its reasons; not that it shared them with anyone. Arthur himself was Head of Ravenclaw of course. Antonio Fernandez Carriedo was head of Syltherin. Arthur paused at that. Another choice that surely seemed odd to most, still Arthur had personal experience as to the man's credibility for the position. His discrepancies with the man had long since been buried though, and even if tense they ought to be able to work civilly with each other.

That, of course, left head of Gryffindor House. Arthur wondered which adventure loving, thrill seeking dolt had earned the position before letting his eyes fall back to the parchment to read their name.

Arthur froze, his luggage only just stopped short of bumping into him. Closing his eyes Arthur willed the name on the page to change. When he opened his eyes to find it hadn't Arthur felt slightly ill.

Of course HE would have asked for a job at Hogwarts, the idiot had probably pestered the headmaster until the man gave in. And of course the hat would choose the biggest Gryffindork to be head of the house.

Alfred F. Jones, as Arthur frowned deeply at the piece of paper he thought perhaps he hadn't aired on the side of caution quite enough in this instance.

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><p>AN: Hey, sorry about this. I felt horrible when I ended on this and even worse when I started chapter four. I kept yelling at myself: "where's the funny! This isn't humor! are you turning this into a drama fic? You better not turn this into an angst fic!" and then I hid and decided to post this and just beg your forgiveness.<p>

Reviews help me know you guys still are interested in reading more so if you want this to continue please let me know, even a short comment as a review is appreciated! You guys are awesome and I promise to try to steer this fic out of overly dramatic waters!

Also, last thing I hope, I mentioned in the summary for the fic and just want to reiterate that there will be homoromantic relationships in this fic. As per the rating it will not morph into homoeroticism but I just want people to know that it will be coming... EVENTUALLY! So... I think that's it... Sorry for such long ANs this time around!

Oh! And remember! Any questions you have are more than welcome and I'll answer them if I can! :D See you at Chapter Four!


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